To be honest his demo reel is too long too. I’m not going to sit through a 5-minute video that is just a string of random clips, unless the work is absolutely amazing. Some show reels like the Mill Show Reel can sustain a slightly longer viewing. Their reel is full of variety from 30 sec spot that cost in the hundred of thousands of dollars.
Some of your shots are really pretty and engaging; pick those to keep. Maybe ask yourself if you could make a compelling still photograph from the scene. Your less successful shots pull down your reel right now. It makes me think you don’t know how to handle some situations and make them interesting with lighting.
SOPA and PIPA which just got shot down would have given infringers up to 5 years in prison for harboring copyrighted material. I think you might want to reconsider using unlicensed music for your reel. You have a lot to lose and little to gain. You don’t need recognizable music for your reel; I think that’s incorrect. You need fitting music for your reel that drives the piece. The song you have right now doesn’t drive the piece. It’s just sort of there and puts a mood over the piece. Imo you need a song that has different sections and strong hits.
Good luck.
You are your own worst enemy right now. You have some really strong stuff there. I might consider finding a talented editor and let him or her see what they can do. I think you are right, you are too close to it and I can tell you don’t want to let a lot of your initial decisions to change.